When my mother was 12 years old, she lost her father, he passed away after a long illness; he left behind him a widow and 7 children, the youngest was 3 and the oldest was 19. At a very young age I intuitively knew what dying meant, for for most of my childhood, up until my twelfth birthday, I was terrified of losing my father, just like it happened to my mother, I was afraid that somehow I would share her same destiny. Nothing happened to my father, but now that I look back on this particular feeling I had, I find it quite remarkable how a child could be so aware of losing a loved one.
On another note, I feel I have a strong connection with my deceased maternal grandfather, often he comes and visits me in dreams, and many times just thinking of him is as soothing as a tender and warm hug; when I'm afraid or particularly troubled, I like to imagine him coming to me and giving me a big hug, and telling me "don't worry, Daniela, everything is gonna be all right, I love you".
And in fact everything IS all right. Nothing can be that upsetting, not even in death
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